8 Stages of Healing
Tap each stage to learn more. Healing is not linear — you may move through these in any order.
Remember, healing isn't a straight line. You might go back and forth between these stages before finding peace. It's important to reach out for support from friends, family, or professionals who can help you along the way.
Each day brings its own challenges, rewards, blessings, tears, and strength. On days when you don't feel strong or powerful or calm or positive, know that it's still ok. Take the time to express those emotions, rest, and then practice loving yourself and your future anyway. Do things your future self will thank you for, and your past self couldn't have done. Celebrate your life.
Practicing Happiness
After traumatic events, such as life in the twenty-first century, your nervous system gets stuck in fight, flight, fawn, or freeze. You may be functioning, but not well. You may feel exhausted, overwhelmed and lost. It's important to feel all the feelings, go through the stages of grief, again and again, until you get all of it out.
At the same time it's important to realize this is a new start and a chance to be much happier and healthier. Try to notice the little things that are good. Take time to be grateful. Do things that bring you joy. You have to teach your body that it is no longer in danger, and reset your system for safety. Try Somatic therapy, EMDR, Meditation, Hypnotherapy and other healing modalities that you are comfortable with. With time, you can and will learn to be happy again.
Happiness is the best revenge.
Forgiveness
Forgiveness is for your benefit, and yours alone. You do not owe anyone forgiveness for hurting you.
Forgiveness is a powerful tool for personal growth and transformation. Holding onto grudges or pain for too long can keep us stuck in negative patterns and prevent us from experiencing true peace and happiness. Forgiveness is important because it liberates us from the past, allowing us to move forward with clarity and purpose.
However, forgiveness can be challenging because it requires us to let go of deeply ingrained emotions and trusted beliefs. It's often easier to hold onto anger or resentment than to confront the pain and vulnerability that comes with forgiveness. Yet, it's essential for our own well-being to release these negative emotions, when we are ready to do so.
When and If you are ready to tackle forgiveness, here are some guidelines. You may never be ready. That's okay too.
Guidelines for Forgiveness
By practicing forgiveness, we free ourselves from the burdens of the past and open ourselves up to new possibilities for growth and healing.
Radical Reshuffle
In the process of starting over, you may find that your circle of people gets smaller and smaller. You may lose friends, other couples, people that have been family to you. If you've been in a narcissistic relationship, you may find that there are more narcissists in your life than you realized.
Establishing boundaries and standing up for yourself may come as a shock to people that count on you to be easily manipulated, like before. You may quickly realize that the only people who will dislike and fight against your new boundaries are the ones that are profiting from you not having any.
Let these people go. Even if it's hard. You will find your tribe as you heal, and it will be the people who truly love and care about you. It will be the real connection that you are looking for now. The type of friendship that wants to see you thriving. Brave it out and don't settle for less. You got this.